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Confessions of a mustard seed.


“Again he said, “What shall we say the kingdom of God is like, or what parable shall we use to describe it? It is like a mustard seed, which is the smallest of all seeds on earth. Yet when planted, it grows and becomes the largest of all garden plants, with such big branches that the birds can perch in its shade.” (Mark 4:30-32 NIV)

So often I feel so small. So tiny and fragile and vulnerable. So weak and unable to do anything, that this world around me is too overwhelming and more than I could ever bear. But I enter a season now of growth, once the tiniest seed of all the seeds of the earth, God has planted me and caused me to grow. And as I expand-I become more and more alien to myself. Who am I now? I’m not who I was, but I’m still more and more myself. I am a me I have never known. My reach and my being is growing much more than that tiny seed I have always known myself to be. I want to bury my head back in the soil and hide, but I must admit that the view is increasingly clearer and more beautiful than I have ever imagined. I must cling onto the true vine and trust him, for he makes my feet light like a deer and shows me which way I should go. To you my Lord I surrender my whole being-even if I don’t understand who I am anymore or who I am becoming.

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